hahahahaha. i'm not actually crying. i just found this and thought it was ridiculous and super emo.
Okay so...I have had no social life as of late. I mean, I run miles upon miles, go to school, and go to work. And I had been watching the NBA playoffs and American Idol but we all know how that turned out...anyway. So every Friday and Saturday night I come home from work, I am usually home alone, and I just do whatever. Like tonight I put my hair in rollers*, cleaned, made brownies for Relief Society tomorrow, and made myself a milkshake all while blasting country music. The point I am getting to is that as I was drinking my milkshake a thought struck me: how could I ever work every day for the rest of my life?! Is this what real life is? Work and school and hair in rollers and cleaning all aloney on my owney? (Please imagine the look on my face as I came to this realization.) And then naturally I started to think about my future and whatnot.
Anyway, I won't bore you with my entire train of thought. But I was just thinking about boys and boyfriends and love, etc. JUST SO YOU KNOW, there are times when I'm not thinking about those things.
So I was like, am I mad that I don't have a boyfriend? No. Absolutely not. Too mushy and embarrassing. Too much drama, too much touching, not enough time. In case you haven't noticed, I'm not the type of girl to be like OMG I NEED A BOYFRIEND STAT AND I MEAN YOU'RE MALE AND YOU'RE HERE AND I KINDA LIKE YOU SO....OKAY YEAH LIKE LET'S DATE LIKE IT'S FINE.
But I think what I don't like is that I don't give enough of a damn about any guy in my life to even care...you know? Like, I don't know a guy that I would want to be my boyfriend. Besides Jimmer. The fun thing about my life up until this point was that I always had a crush on someone. I feel like. Even if the love went unrequited (so 99% of the time), it was still fun to be giddy and ask the boy for gum during class or something and then chew it obsessively until it disintegrated. And most of the time, I didn't even actually want the love to be requited. Unrequited love is the only kind of love that doesn't freak me out beyond belief. So I guess I just gotta do me and grow up a little until some VERY lucky guy bursts into Zupas in the middle of my shift and exclaims that he can't live without me and he would like an Ultimate Grilled Cheese to-go.
Aaaaaand until then it's brownies and ice cream and rollers, I suppose.
*This woman came into Zupas today with rollers in her hair and they looked way cool and I didn't even realize they were rollers at first so I asked her about them and she told me and I went and got them after work. So we will see if they are awesome like she says.